Trust your instincts. You don't need to confirm abuse to check in with someone. Ask how they’re doing, express concern, and let them know you’re there to talk or help. Listen without judgment.
Avoid confrontation with the abuser. Focus on the victim’s needs. Offer emotional support and resources, not ultimatums. Respect their pace—they know their situation best. Your role is to support, not rescue.
Safety is a priority—for both the person experiencing abuse and yourself. If someone is in immediate danger, call emergency services. Otherwise, support can be offered discreetly, such as providing hotline numbers, suggesting a safety plan, or checking in regularly.
Absolutely. Empathy, consistency, and connection are powerful tools. You don’t need to be an expert to show someone they’re not alone or to guide them to trained professionals who can help.
That’s okay. Many people aren’t ready to talk, or may not see their experience as abuse. Keep the door open. Let them know you care and are available whenever they’re ready.
Provide contact info for local shelters, hotlines, or advocacy groups. National options include:
National Domestic Violence Hotline: 1800-777-0000
Police Emergency Hotline: 999
Frequent unexplained injuries, withdrawal from friends or activities, hyper-vigilance, excessive communication from a controlling partner, or isolation can be red flags. Pay attention to shifts in mood, appearance, or behavior.